*Disclaimer: For those in the know, the entendre in this title isn’t lost on me, but it was not intended.
“I think I want to give up dreaming,” I spoke into the speakerphone of my HTC Evo Shift.
His voice was heavy with confusion. “You wanna do what?”
“I know, I know. It sounds like I’m going all Phonte on you, but hear me out…”
“Um. Okaaaay…”
I wanted to this opportunity to do two things:
1. Show off a skill that I was late acquiring, but am still geeked about nonetheless.
2. Share another confirmation from The Universe that my life will be just fine.
Last night, my favorite blogger @abelleinbk (Seriously, I stan for this woman. She’s what 20something writers want to be when we grow up.) began a series of tweets that spoke directly to my neverending anxiety about my future.
Yesterday I was having a text conversation with one of my fav East Coast homies (Shout out to him if he’s reading this) and the question came up: “What do you wanna be when you grow up?” Before I could even think twice, I found myself typing the words: “Mutlimedia mogul. Think smarter than Tyra but hipper than Oprah.” Immediately after I hit SEND, I thought to myself, Where the hell did that come from?
I have to admit that it sounded pretty damn good. I can certainly see myself there. The problem is the amount of sacrifice that goes into pursuing such a high goal. I must say, I’m not good at sacrificing. Not at all. I tend to set my goals in a way that allows me to stop and smell the roses every now and then because what’s the point in getting to a destination if you can’t enjoy the journey, you know? I ask myself a serious question almost daily. Do I want to have it all or just a nice manageable piece of it?
I’m not sure that there are any goals that are worth missing out on simple joys of life. Drinks with friends, lazy days spent doing absolutely nothing, skipping the occasional meeting for date night with someone special. Do I lack ambition if I say that those things are as important to my success as what I can achieve career wise? There are some people who have great tunnel vision. Within the last year I’ve come to enjoy taking the scenic route to my goals. Always mindful of the path, but occasionally veering off. Some turns in the road are more enjoyable than others, but even the rough patches have given me some lessons to take with me along the way.
Who knows what the future has in store for me? I guess only time will tell.
Just a girl with a writing habit, using a blog to share my stories and passions. These are the tales, interests, and observations of the quiet nerd in the corner of the bookstore; the professional woman strutting down the street in slacks clutching her Blackberry; the dork in bed by 9pm on a Saturday night; and the B-girl in the middle of the dance floor getting down in her sensible shoes. Welcome to the world of The Skinny Black Girl.
