It is the last day of my twenties.
For the last week or so I’ve wondered what this post would look like. What I would write to tie together both the end of my 20s and the beginning of my 30s, but the only way not to cheat my 20s out of their proper good-bye, nor my 30s out of their proper hello was to write two different posts.
There’s not much I can say about 20something SBG that hasn’t been described in prior posts. And honestly, I can’t do any of the former versions of myself justice speaking of them in past tense. At each station over the last few years, I’ve been who I needed to be, when I needed to be it. Knowing that gives me a sense of peace about some of my prior foolishness. Other moments, I have to accept as cringe worthy. I ask if you chose to relive those parts of my life via old posts, that you please refrain from reminding me of them. I’m pretty well-versed in my madness. We can leave the past on the blog. Haha.
To tie this all in a nice little bow, I figured I would use the format of my favorite magazine column: Esquire Magazine’s “What I’ve Learned.” So sit with me as I light this cigar (Wait. I don’t smoke cigars, but it’s a special occasion, so whatever) and sip this whiskey as a final toast to 20something SBG.
I’ve lost a lot of time, energy—and hell, my mind—to overthinking. If there is a piece of advice I’d give the 20something me it would be to stop thinking so much. I’ve never found a single answer in my head. Any answer I’ve found was on the other side of an experience.
That’s a cool thing about turning 30. I trust myself to go through the tough times and come out whole.
If you have even a shred of wisdom, you can’t help but look back at life and find some moments you wish you’d done differently. The difference between wisdom and regret, however, is that regret dwells and wishes to relive those moments. Wisdom accepts the fallout and moves forward.
I’ve learned far more about love by opting out of it, than I ever learned while in its grasp. There are a lot of feelings to have for a man: desire, respect, admiration, infatuation, good old fashioned “like,” but we minimize these feelings with “all or nothing” thinking about romance.
Desire, respect, admiration, infatuation, and “like” are all beautiful. To enjoy them for their own sake isn’t “settling.” Honoring the pit stops between all and nothing help you better identify when “all” shows up.
The less I know about other people’s business, the smoother my life runs.
I can’t remember a time I’ve ever felt this desirable. When I look in the mirror, I see all types of beauty and sex appeal. I own it.
But I’m not insulted if anyone else doesn’t see the same. How you feel about me is your prerogative. But what you won’t do is tell me how to feel about me.
And with that, I bid my 20s adieu. See you all on the other side.